Elton John once sang, ‘Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word’, but in our experience, the hardest word in business is often ‘no’.
During some recent discussions, a couple of Glisk Consultants mentioned that they struggle to say no, which leaves them with more work than they can handle. So, let’s look at some of the issues that can arise when you are not confident to say no, and what you can do about it.
What happens if you don’t learn to say no?
- Burnout – if you can’t say no, you end up being the person taking on too much work and that will end up with you burning yourself out and impacting your mental health.
- Poor Delivery – taking on too many tasks will result in you doing many things, but poorly.
- Frustration – when you are the one taking on all the work, you will find yourself looking at others in frustration, or worse, resentment.
- Quality of Life – too much work will result in your personal life being impacted negatively.
How do we usually receive requests for work?
- Formally or informally – you may receive requests through formal channels, or you might find someone asking for a favour.
- Large or Small – you might find some requests seem small but be cautious of the tasks that could unexpectedly spiral into a huge amount of unexpected work.
- Varying Platforms – phone, in-person, Teams chats, email, via someone else. There are lots of ways you may receive a request, and keeping track of these can be a challenge.
The collaborative nature of modern work means that requests will not just come from your immediate line manager, they can come from many sources.
Firstly, let’s think of your time like portfolio management…
Portfolio management is not about doing projects right, it’s about doing the right projects. Leveraging the MoP Portfolio Definition Cycle for task management, we can think about requests for our time and energy in the following way:
Understand – Without understanding the requests that come to us, how can we work out what is important? Ask questions and define the outcome so you know what you are getting yourself into.
Categorise – Think of requests in different categories, for example, for my boss, for a teammate, it’s my personal life, etc.
Prioritise – What priority does each task have? Is it urgent? Important, but not right now Not-time bound etc.
Balance – Now we know what we are being asked to do, who or what it is for, what the priority is, we can focus on what is achievable with our given resources, i.e. time, money, energy etc.
Plan – Planning is vital, and checklists are an effective way to stay on top of things.
In reality, you won’t have time to go through this process if your boss asks you for something urgently, so you have to triage each request quickly against what else you have on your plan and work out what might have to give.
Saying No
People do not enjoy saying no to others, which is why we nearly always say yes. There are times in our lives when ‘no’ is ok. So, what kind of request should we say no to?
- Saying no to something that is not legal or moral is easy, or at least it should be!
- If you do not have the capability, i.e. the requisite skills to undertake the tasks, you should feel empowered to say no.
- If you have the skills but not the required time, then again, you should be able to say no.
- If you have undertaken a similar task previously and know it is not the right thing to do, then your previous experience should allow you to say no.
Any alternative to ‘no’, yes…if
Saying ‘yes, if’ is a good technique as it is optimistic and demonstrates willingness. It can be a powerful tool as it forces others to consider the options, for example:
Project Business Owner: “Could you please review the business case and pull a pack together about which of our benefits have been achieved and which haven’t?”
Project Manager: “Sure, I can do that, if we can have someone else run the UAT sessions this week?
Project Manager: “Can you make sure you have updated the slides for the steering committee pack with successful test cases please?”
Test Manager: “I can do that, if someone else can triage the defects that are coming out of SIT for me?”
Some golden rules when saying no to a request
- Make sure it is a ‘considered’ no, i.e. you have a valid reason, and you were not too hasty in dismissing the ask.
- Always be professional when declining, it might simply be a matter of timing, and there’s a potential to offer assistance in the future or if circumstances change.
- Clear communication is vital, if you say no, make sure the person making the request is aware and does not expect further action from you.
In a recent lunch and learn session, we practiced role-playing scenarios related to this topic, and even after thorough discussion, participants still found it difficult to decline requests, underscoring the necessity of mastering this skill in one’s career to avoid the situations highlighted at the start of this blog.
We hope this blog has helped and has given you some things to think about around time management and saying no to request. We are always happy to share our experience. Get in touch if you want to discuss in more details by contacting us here.
